Burnout at Work: How to Know If You're Burnt Out and How to Start to Recover by Sarah Cosway

You're normally the person who remembers everyone's birthday, listens

to your partner's day with genuine interest, and lights up when your

child runs in bursting with news.

So when your five-year-old excitedly tells you something that would

normally make your heart sing, and you realise you just...weren't really

there, you have a dawning realisation - that's not who you are. Or at

least who you were...but perhaps it is now who you have become...

Could this be burnout?

Is It Burnout, Stress, or Am I Just Lazy?

I commonly hear clients judging themselves as being lazy and using

words such as “should be” in relation to things they’re no longer doing.

But let’s be clear, burnout is not laziness!

It's not even just stress. Stress typically feels like too much pressure,

but you’re pushing through, struggling and still trying to get it done.

Burnout is what happens when that pressure has gone on for too long

and your coping reserves have run dry. You’re completely spent...you

are feeling numb, empty and disengaged.

Understanding the difference and stepping back from judging yourself is

the first step towards getting yourself back onto the road to coping.

Signs of Work-Related Burnout and Why They're Easy to Miss

1. You've become unusually short-tempered. If you've always

been laid-back and suddenly find yourself snapping, feeling

disproportionate levels of frustration, or carrying an impatience that

feels foreign to you, pay attention. This isn't a newly arrived

character flaw....it's a signal that something is wrong.

2. Your sleep is all over the place. You're relying on coffee to get

going in the morning and alcohol or sleeping tablets to wind down

at night. This cycle becomes exhausting in and of itself, and you

start to feel like a stranger in your own body.

3. Your brain feels foggy and your confidence is slipping. You're

second-guessing decisions you'd normally make easily. You're

forgetting things. And rather than slowing down, you just try to push

through in order to compensate...but this only deepens your

burnout further.

How to Recover from Burnout Without Quitting Your Job

1. Ring-fence your "me time", and protect it fiercely. Turn your

phone off for an hour and be genuinely uncontactable. Fill that time

with something that replenishes you, not something productive.

This isn't laziness or indulgence, it's maintenance.

2. Leave work at work. Work-life balance might sound like a cliché,

but there's real wisdom in it. Checking emails at 10pm isn't

dedication, it's keeping your nervous system in a permanent state

of alert. Decide on a cut-off and respect your boundary.

3. Consider delegating. Sometimes burnout takes hold because

we're carrying more than our share. If colleagues can help, then let

them. If perfectionism is making that feel impossible, the worry that

it won't be done quite right or as well you can will do yourself, then

that's worth exploring in itself, because it could be part of what’s

got you to the point of burnout in the first place.

4. Talk to your employer about reasonable adjustments. This is

an underused option. Temporary changes to workload, hours, or

responsibilities can make a significant difference to helping you get

back on track. For those who are neurodiverse, this conversation

can be especially important. And it’s worth bearing in mind that

many adjustments that support neurodivergent employees (such

as pacing and clear role boundaries) are exactly the kind that help

anyone experiencing burnout.

Burnout Is Treatable — and You Don't Have to Do It Alone

Burnout doesn’t have to become a long-term condition, and recovery

doesn't require quitting your job to retreat to a hut in the woods. With the

right support and supported self-reflection, most people find their way

back to themselves.

One thing to keep in mind is that burnout and depression frequently

travel together, so if your mood is so low that you’re feeling hopeless, or

simply unable to function, then it’s important to speak to your GP.

The version of you who was present, patient, and engaged, hasn’t gone

anywhere; they're just running on empty.

If any of this resonates, it might be time to talk to someone. Remember,

you deserve to feel like yourself again!

Bio: Sarah Cosway is a BABCP-accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist with over a decade of experience working in mental health, both within the NHS and in private practice. She offers tailored CBT in a compassionate, collaborative environment, empowering clients to build resilience and manage their mental well-being with confidence. https://www.coswaycbt.co.uk